no love lost?

there once was a boy.

a boy i cared a great deal about.

however, being the stupid girl that i was and am, i decided, without consulting him, that there was no way he would care about me a great deal in return.

with age comes, hopefully, wisdom.

looking through the corrective lenses of hindsight, i realize that in fact, he did.

as a matter of fact, i think he continued to for some time.

i have no idea why.

i'm sure i didn't deserve it.

but the part that shatters me the most: recognizing this means i must come face to face with lost opportunity.

the possibility that opportunity has been lost permenantly.

i held a torch for the opportunity's return for a long while.

but sadly, that torch is nearly extinguished.

i fear that i must now embrace my position and accept it for what it is.

i must let go of what could have been.

beacause what could have been, is not what is.