to a friend

i hope you know that, no matter what opinion you express to me, no matter how strongly we both stick to our guns in a disagreement, i'll never like you less. i think that people who have identical opinions and views on life aren't really meant to be friends. how old would it get if every discussion friends ever had was like,

"i think this."

"i completely agree."

"cool. me too."

*barf!*

something that's always bothered me ... i totally get not letting your past control or dictate who you are. i think it's way healthy for people to move past what has happened in their past and not use it as a crutch for life. however, and i may be WAY off base here, sometimes i think that maybe you DO care about what happened. i think maybe you tell yourself you don't or maybe really think you don't because i'm sure caring about it would really really hurt. but i think that caring about it, getting really pissed off about it, would maybe help you realize that you don't "think you're a better person than you really are deep down." you ARE as great of a person as you can imagine. i think that's awful to sell yourself short like that! i think that you need to be really really pissed off about what those people did to you because you do NOT deserve for ANYONE to treat you like that. i think that those people robbed a big chunk of your self worth and self confidence and that is WRONG! i don't know, like i said, i may be way off base. but i really do think that those things are related.

anyway, again, just know that no matter how hard we both argue for our side of an opinion or how silly or ridiculous you think my views on something are or vice versa, even in those moments, i still love you. if i didn't have anyone in my life who expressed an opposite opinion of mine, when would i ever be challenged to really look at what i think and why i think it? and it goes the same the other direction. i hope you don't ever think that you can't tell me that you think that God isn't real or that it's stupid for me not to click "start communication" or that our dump should keep expanding. i'll tell you that you're wrong, you'll tell me that i'm dumb and you're right, we'll both be quiet for a while and then adam levine will come on the radio and we'll talk about how much we love him. in those moments, i'll never think, ugh, "why are we friends? i can't stand this girl." (haha, even if i say, "i can't believe we're friends" ... sorry. that one just comes out. i swear i don't mean it.)

i don't know if any of this made you feel any better or made you mad or made any sense. but i just hope you know, you're my friend, no matter how many midnight showings of twilight you make me go to. just like, hopefully, i'm your friend, no matter how many times i put everything off until the last minute and then need you to kick me in my ass to get me going.

love you 4real.

-me.